The whole first trimester I had so many thoughts running through my brain that I have wanted to share/ write down. This being my third pregnancy I have been able to compare and contrast it to my 1st two pregnancies and I have learned a lot of things about my body and how it works while pregnant. It has been very fascinating and very humbling all at the same time.
I loved this pregnancy up until my 6th week lol and then I crashed and burned. It was ugly. I was in an ugly place and I felt terrible for being there.
But let me back up a little bit to where I started out this pregnancy. The last two trimesters of my pregnancy with Jensen were unreal for me. I felt amazing, I had no swelling, very little pain, and had the energy of a 12 year old. I thought I was pretty awesome. I thought wow! pregnancy can be great, even easy if I just eat fairly well and exercise often. Jensen's first year was a great one for me too as I reached my weight goals and really took control of my health. I knew I didn't have it all figured out, but I thought I was doing a pretty good job at handling life and its challenges. Well at the end of last year I knew we might get pregnant again soon so I started thinking about that nasty morning sickness stuff and I did a little research and came across these 2 blog posts. Their recommendations are similar and so I began following their advice religiously... about 1 week before I got pregnant. I was using magnesium oil, taking fermented cod liver oil, etc. Well if you read their advice they say do all of those things for serveral months BEFORE you get pregnant. So it didn't work for me. 6 weeks came and I still got sick. I was sick all day and all night. No throwing up, but nausus, hungry, and super tired. ALL THE TIME.
I had to eat every 45 minutes for the first several weeks. I felt really bad for eating so much at first, but I soon realized that it was what my body needed. Honestly I think my body needed to gain a little extra weight this time in order to grow a healthy baby. So I stopped stressing and just tried to not get too out of control (haha, just read the next sentence to see if I got out of control. lol). Now the only thing I feel bad about from the first trimester is what I ate. Lets just say we ate out several times a week for those first few weeks. BAD! Mostly it was at lunch time when I just needed to get out of the house, yet it was too cold to just go outside. The kids loved it and definitely got their fill of French fries. Today we are back on track with better eating and I hope to not gain so much this next trimester.
But I have to say the most humbling part of my first trimester was the prenatal depression that came with it. I was pretty down on life, myself, and my situation. I would describe it at being numb. Nothing really made me happy during those months, and I was pretty discouraged about my situation. I mean here I was supposed to be happy that we were having another baby and I could hardly appreciate the kids that I already had. I had no ounce of creativity either. I would look around my house and wonder where in the world I ever got the motivation to decorate it? I wondered why I ever even liked pinterest :) and I did not try one new recipe for several months. Cleaning, organizing, and doing activities with my kids were all very low on my priority list. Looking back I realized that I had to same symptoms with my first two pregnancies I just didn't categorize it as prenatal depression. Thankfully it only lasts through my first trimester, so it was short lived, and I was able to come out of it in the last few weeks.
I feel the creative juices flowing again, even if the pregnancy hormones are right there with them :)
After having these not so fun feelings, emotions, etc. for a few months. I am truly humbled at what women have to go through to bring children into the world and some women do it over and over again. My pregnancies are hard for a few months but there is a light at the end of the tunnel once the 2nd trimester kicks in. But some women struggle day in and day out for 9 months and some even for several months afterward. It is a hard thing to be grateful, Christ like and charitable when you feel so sick. Thank you for all of your great examples that were inspiration to me as I had a few rough months. :)
Anyways, moving on from me. The baby is doing great so far. I was SO worried at each one of my check ups as I know things can happen so easily in those first few weeks. My first appointment was on valentines day. I was 9 weeks and they did a ultrasound to make sure everything was going well. With this pregnancy I switched from our family doctor to a midwife so I had never had an appointment/ultrasound so early on and was pretty excited to see the baby. I told the ultrasound tech that I was pretty nervous to see how everything was going. So right off the bat when we saw the baby she yells out I see a baby and a heartbeat so all is well! LOL It was very sweet of her to calm my fears so quickly. :)
My 2nd appointment was March 14th and I was about 12 weeks (they keep changing my due date so I felt like I was 12 weeks along for about 2 weeks). They tried to find the heartbeat, but the baby wasn't having it so once again I got an ultrasound. Waiting for that ultrasound was tough since of course I was worried something was wrong, but once again all was well and the baby looks great. So grateful!
We really are so happy to be having this next little baby! Even with all of the sickness thrown in. McKay has been so helpful and never complains when he is asked to help all the time. He has even had to stay home from work a few days when the kids are sick and it is just too much for me to handle on my own. We are in this together and heaven knows we are both going to have to work a ton as this new one arrives. 3 kids 3 and under are going to be a lot of work!
Heres to a great 2nd trimester! It is spring so how can it not be great? :)
